Sunday, November 20, 2005

Time Flies When You're Having Fun

Mrs. Wonders and I have agreed to give The Sack one year of probation.

Given all the shenanigans in the past year (we only scrape the surface here), Mrs. Wonders thinks we should consider moving.

My feelings are mixed.

I could do without some of the nuttiness. But The Sack can be an interesting and entertaining place, too.

If things are calm for the next twelve months, Mrs. Wonders agrees that we'll stay.

I wonder if anyone knows a good real estate agent.

***
Gordon is now aware that Dirk and Dora will be returning to Burning Manor.

Not surprisingly, he was very upset. Oscar says Gordon hasn't been this angry since he caught Doo peeing on his rhododendrons, a few years ago.

Something tells me Gordon will be spending a lot of time at his front window this winter.

***
Speaking of young Doo, it appears he has joined the ranks of The Sack's junior entrepreneurs.

He came to our door yesterday selling Christmas wreaths. It's part of a fundraising thing for his swimming club.

Of course, it took considerable time to determine what he was selling and for what purpose.

***
When I opened the door, Doo mumbled something about "weefs." After repeating himself several times, he took a deep breath and slowly said, "reefs."

I was about to send him over to Weed's place, when he waved a sheet of paper at me.

That's how I found out about the Christmas wreaths.

***
Then I made the mistake of asking him why he was selling the wreaths.

"It's for my wimin cwub." he said.

One day, I may be Old Mr. Wonders. But it's unlikely I'll ever be Stupid Old Mr. Wonders.

Doo is not on the fundraising committee of a womens group.

***
Of course, I already knew why he was selling the wreaths. The information was on the paper he showed me.

I just wanted to hear him say "swimming club."

If Doo never gets to a speech therapist, he'll need all the practice he can get.

***
Conservationists will be saddened by the news that a second tree branch has been broken in The Sack.

There is a handful of trees in The Sack's centre circle. Kids like to congregate there. They also like to swing on the tree branches.

This is the second broken branch in the last two weeks.

***
No adults witnessed this latest branch-breaking. Doo, of course, broke the first one.

This time, there were four kids playing in the circle. Tremayne was there with his older brother, Jimbo.

The two kids from Rental Doug's blended family were also there.

***
Oscar says he doesn't like Rental Doug's kids very much.

It has nothing to do with Rental Doug being a likely son of Satan, Oscar says.

"It's because they always have snarky looks on their faces." he says. "That's all."

***
Tremayne was the one who broke the branch.

Oscar says Jimbo fingered his little brother for the crime within seconds. I wasn't impressed by this. Nor was Oscar.

Brothers should stick together when they're kids.

***
Gordon has warned all the kids that a "zero tolerance policy" is now in place, as far as branch-breaking is concerned.

To reinforce the matter, he also told them that an "orange alert" has been instituted throughout The Sack. Tree branches will be watched very closely.

An "orange alert", I'm told, is a level of hypervigilance just below that of a mental illness.

***

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

but you can't move!!

Clint said...

I can't imagine "Norman Neighborhood Street Blues" being nearly as captivating.

I doubt Mrs. Wonders is factoring in a decrease in blog source material, though.

Guy Wonders said...

I can't see moving, to be honest.
If Burning Manor goes up in flames again, maybe. The law of averages suggests this is unlikely. I hope.

Mrs. Wonders has not considered my job here in The Sack, when she talks about moving. She has this silly thing about safety and security. Safety and security first, she says, and blogging second.

Man, talk about rigid.

Clint said...

On a re-read, my post makes little sense. Change "Norman" to "Normal" when you read it.

Yeesh.

It would be bizarre now if you moved to Norman Street somewhere.

Women are so silly sometimes.

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails