Friday, December 02, 2005

Pyjama Man

The old town has yet to see snow this year.

It's the first time in recent memory without any white stuff before December. Big Doug, king of the shovelers, doesn't know what to do with himself. He's in uncharted territory; he can't do any lawn maintenance and he can't shovel.

He's in no man's land. It must be driving him insane.

***
Wednesday morning finds your Sack reporter driving to work.

I had only traveled about a kilometre, when I saw something very interesting.

Oscar was walking along the side of the road, carrying a large paper shopping bag. He was wearing a brown leather jacket and a pair of loafers without socks. Besides the jacket and loafers, Oscar was wearing a complete set of pyjamas.

***
The pyjamas were a pale white with a varied snowflake design. Flannel would be my best guess.

***
Quickly, I pulled over to the curb. Oscar got in the car immediately.

"Thanks." he said calmly.

***
Oscar had driven his wife, G.W., to work. It's his custom to do this in his pyjamas. She only works about three kilometres away.

He said pyjamas are very comfortable to drive in. Until now, he added, there had been no problems with wearing them.

On this day, however, Oscar's car broke down on the way home. Luckily, he was very close to a service station. Unluckily, he had to leave the car there until it could be repaired.

***
Oscar said he couldn't get a ride from anyone at the service station. They were too busy.

He considered taking a taxi, but he left his wallet at home. The wallet wouldn't have helped him anyway, Oscar admitted. He didn't have any money in it.

So Oscar decided to walk home. His son, Dorian was still sleeping at home. Oscar had to get back to send the lad off to school.

"That's how the routine normally works." he said.

***
I asked him why he didn't try hitch hiking.

Oscar looked at me with a smirk and pointed at his pyjamas.

"C'mon, that would've looked pretty stupid, wouldn't it?"

***
Protruding from Oscar's shopping bag was Santa Claus.

More specifically, it was Santa's smiling face on a large plastic Christmas decoration meant for Oscar's front door.

G.W. had bought it the day before, but left it in the car by mistake. Oscar was responsible for putting it up that day.

She would have been very displeased if he'd left it in the car.

***
Oscar tried very hard to convince me to take the day off work.

Admittedly, it was a beautiful morning in the old town. It was sunny and mild, with only the hint of a breeze.

It wasn't mild enough to walk around in your pyjamas, of course, but it was still a very nice day.

***
"Listen," Oscar said, "we could go out for breakfast."

Oscar knows that I have fondness for a restaurant breakfast. He's a big fan of this too. We both agree that breakfast can be the best meal of the day, when you have the time for it.

Despite his earnest nudging, I told him I must go to work. I had too many commitments to play hooky today.

"Look at it out there." he said, pointing out the window as I drove him home. "You'd be crazy if you went to work on a day like this."

"Crazy?" I replied, looking Oscar up and down. "Who's walking down the street in his pyjamas, carrying a Santa head?"

Oscar paused for a moment and then said, "You might have a point there."

***
Speaking of the holiday season, Gordon has placed two mechanized reindeer on his front lawn. The reindeer are made of thick wire and are covered in white Christmas lights.

Each reindeer holds a different pose. Both have heads that slowly move up and down.

Gordon puts out his reindeer every year.

***
Several hours after Gordon had finished with the careful positioning of the reindeer, Oscar left a little surprise for him.

Under the cover of darkness, he repositioned one of the reindeer. Now it was slowly and repeatedly putting its nose into the hindquarters of the other reindeer.

***
Gordon wasn't upset when he discovered Oscar's work the next day. In fact, he wasn't even surprised.

Oscar does this to Gordon's reindeer every year.

***
Finally, I learned something very interesting the other day. Elizabeth, of all people, is a socialist.

Well, maybe not a real socialist. But she does support the New Democratic Party, Canada's largest left-of-centre political party.

Elizabeth has a big NDP sign on her front lawn. The federal election was announced this week. It will be held on January 23.

***
I plan to keep track of the election signs which go up in the Sack over the coming weeks. Maybe, these numbers will reflect the outcome of the election across the country.

So far, the social democrats, as the NDP refers to itself these days, are winning the race by one vote. Elizabeth's sign is the only one in the Sack, so far.

***
If the current result holds and it does reflect the rest of the country's mood, Canada will soon be known as the People's Social Democratic Republic of Canada.

Of course, that would be crazy.

But when I see Oscar walking about in his pyjamas, loafers and a Santa head, I suppose anything is possible.

***

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